-When is the part-time thing happening?, this sous chef asked.

I told him I had to wait until the end of the month to hear back from the powers above.

-You must feel special. They’ve never done anything like that for anyone before.

Yeah, special, I said, rolling my eyes.

I respect this sous chef a lot. He cares about the job he does, and in this very stressful environment, he does it extremely well. He treats everyone in the kitchen fairly, and is very level headed, despite the impossible number of coffees that he drinks and cigarettes he smokes. He buys Gatorade for the boys, and watermelon for me. Away from work, he also has twin baby girls and probably the world’s most understanding wife. How he juggles all this, is, really beyond me.

To tell you the truth, the one thing I really feel is maybe a bit guilty. Guilty that I can feel the tiredness scratching the back of my eyes. The loop of the blue striped apron hangs like a noose around the neck. Call it a derivative of Stockholm syndrome or whatever, but I still love my job, and can’t imagine ever doing anything else. Probably my one big problem is that I’m not good at the whole juggling thing.

This week, I will be mostly :

1 Listening to Heart by Stars
2 Reading The Time Traveller’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
3 Missing the boy, who flies to Vegas soon, “for work”

Last week, I finished reading a book. The first one in ages. I realised a long time ago, that one of the sad things about growing up is that I no longer have time to lounge around all Summer, sucking down chocolate Paddle Pops, surrounded by a sky-high stack of books. It was through many youthful (and pallid) years of avoiding the hot sun and the tyrannies of a sandy beach, that I discovered Hunter S. Thompson’s letters, the Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Unbearable Lightness of Being, and Neil Gaiman’s Sandman (ironic, isn’t it) stories.

In fact, these days, I kind of wonder what the 14 year old version of me, would think of myself now. Would I be disappointed to discover that I’m not that veterinarian or forensic scientist?

I think the 32 year old me will probably say to the 14 year old : Listen, the first thing you need to know, is that Chad Allen is never going to reply to your fan letter, and not just because it turns out that he’s gay. Secondly, life, is going to be nothing like you expected it to be. Disappointingly to your parents, you will not have “Dr.” in front of your name, nor will you sport a fancy ring on your finger or 2.5 kids at your hip.

No, it’s actually going to be even better. You will go to University and even though you will end up doing nothing related to your resulting degree, you will relish the experience. You will make friends there that you still count as some of your closest to this day. In your first year, you will also get your first computer account and through it you will meet even more new people, including one guy who will start out as a friend and eventually turn into someone who means so much more to you.

Today, he will come home from work and you will have soy glazed pork with slaw and potato fritters, followed by a frozen chocolate mousse cake. Whatever happens after that, and the day after, doesn’t matter, because it will be just as wonderful and unexpected as the days have been so far.

So, breathe, relax. It’ll turn out okay. Although, maybe you might want to learn how to juggle a little bit..

(Frozen chocolate mousse cake : chocolate sauce, sour cherries (compote and sorbet), peanut butter powder, peanut and banana tuille)

Caramel. The ultimate expression of the potential of sugar.

(The above line works better if you imagine Jean-Luc Picard saying it)

—

In a move as wildly unanticipated as black beans in brownies, I have recently found myself obsessed with listening to Guns and Roses. This is surprising even for me, because I have never really rated them too highly in the past. In their heyday, the only GnR-related things that ever registered on my radar were Slash’s hair, and Stephanie Seymour walking down the aisle in November Rain.

Now, I can’t stop listening to them. I’ve become an instant fan (just add sugar..) and even found myself arguing with B the other day over whether November Rain was on Appetite for Destruction. He insisted no. “And I should know,” he said, “I’ve listened to that album millions of times.” “So have I,” I countered, “I listened to them millions of times.. erm..yesterday!” Of course, it turns out the track is on Use your Illusion I.

Anyway, Appetite for Destruction makes for great baking music. Or maybe it doesn’t. Perhaps I was sufficiently distracted by the music to calculate my conversions wrongly (darn cup measures!). Perhaps it was the mistaken double amount of butter I incorporated into my cake mix, or the extra flour, but I don’t think the end result was as originally intended. Mind you, the cake still turned out well, with a lovely caramel flavour, but it wasn’t anything to get too excited about.

So, I’m putting this one down as a “glad I made this, but probably wouldn’t be tempted to repeat it again!” challenge. As for decorations, I wasn’t feeling too inspired when it came to making this cake, probably because I had already been making quite a few cakey related things this month, so I went for a simple round cake, split it and slathered on the thinest scraping of vanilla cream, then topped it with some hazelnut macarons (my best attempt to date, of an adapted Paco Torreblanca recipe) sandwiched with the leftover frosting and chocolate ganache.

Meanwhile, I’m sitting back with another macaron and a cup of tea, wishing someone would take me down to the Paradise City…

Caramel Cake with Caramelised Butter Frosting :
(Note: I realised after putting the cake into the oven that I had stuffed up my conversions, so the cake recipe below is the original unconverted recipe, cup measures and all.)

CAKE:
10 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/3 cup Caramel Syrup (see recipe below)
2 eggs, at room temperature
splash vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 cup milk, at room temperature

Preheat oven to 176’C.

Butter one tall (2 – 2.5 inch deep) 9-inch cake pan.

In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, cream butter until smooth. Add sugar and salt & cream until light and fluffy.

Slowly pour room temperature caramel syrup into bowl. Scrape down bowl and increase speed. Add eggs/vanilla extract a little at a time, mixing well after each addition. Scrape down bowl again, beat mixture until light and uniform.

Sift flour and baking powder.

Turn mixer to lowest speed, and add one third of the dry ingredients. When incorporated, add half of the milk, a little at a time. Add another third of the dry ingredients, then the other half of the milk and finish with the dry ingredients.

Take off mixer and by hand, use a spatula to do a few last folds, making sure batter is uniform. Turn batter into prepared cake pan.

Place cake pan on cookie sheet or 1/2 sheet pan. Set first timer for 30 minutes, rotate pan and set timer for another 15-20 minutes. Your own oven will set the pace. Bake until sides pull away from the pan and skewer inserted in middle comes out clean. Cool cake completely before icing it.

Cake will keep for three days outside of the refrigerator.

CARAMEL SYRUP:
392g sugar
125g water
250g water (for “stopping” the caramelisation process)
In a small stainless steel saucepan, with tall sides, mix water and sugar until mixture feels like wet sand. Brush down any stray sugar crystals with wet pastry brush. Turn on heat to highest flame. Cook until smoking slightly: dark amber.

When color is achieved, very carefully pour in one cup of water. Caramel will jump and sputter about! It is very dangerous, so have long sleeves on and be prepared to step back.

Whisk over medium heat until it has reduced slightly and feels sticky between two fingers. {Obviously wait for it to cool on a spoon before touching it.}

CARAMELISED BUTTER FROSTING:
180g unsalted butter
453g icing sugar, sifted
4-6 tablespoons heavy cream
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2-4 tablespoons caramel syrup
Kosher or sea salt to taste

Cook butter until brown. Pour through a fine meshed sieve into a heatproof bowl, set aside to cool.

Pour cooled brown butter into mixer bowl.

In a stand mixer fitted with a paddle or whisk attachment, add icing sugar a little at a time. When mixture looks too chunky to take any more, add a bit of cream and or caramel syrup. Repeat until mixture looks smooth and all icing sugar has been incorporated. Add salt to taste.

Note: Caramelised butter frosting will keep in fridge for up to a month.
To smooth out from cold, microwave a bit, then mix with paddle attachment until smooth and light

(This month’s DB challenge recipe was brought to you by Shuna Fish Lydon of Eggbeater, as selected by the wonderful Dolores of Culinary Curiosity and co-hosted by Alex and Jenny. Thanks guys!)

You might want to bookmark this post for future reference, because it contains the best excuse ever, for not turning up to something.

A friend was in a bit of a bind the other day, because she had organised to attend a show with two other friends and they had cancelled on her at the last minute, despite the fact she had already bought tickets for everyone. The first person was sick, and as for the second? Well, you’d expect that her car might have broken down, a toilet was severely blocked, or she had taken ill as well. But no :

“X just sent me an email saying that she just found out that a liver to dissect will be coming in this afternoon and she’s not sure if she’ll be able to make it.”

How is that for an awesome excuse?

Oh, and the chocolate cake is pretty good too. But no one ever needs an excuse to make yet another chocolate cake. 😀

Chocolate Fudge Cake :
This cake didn’t look like anything special to me, until I read the recipe closely and discovered that the batter is actually baked in two stages, yielding a dense fudgey layer at the base, and a moussey layer on top. Intriguing enough to warrant an attempt. My version turned out wonderfully moist with great chocolate flavour, but it wasn’t quite so obvious that there was a distinction between the layers. I think if I wanted a true moussey layer, I’d still prefer to make the Eve’s chocolate cake. If you want to try making this cake, but can’t be bothered baking it twice, you can just bake the entire cake as is. It will still be great.
(serves 6-8, from Ottolenghi : The Cookbook, by Yotam Ottolenghi and Sami Tamimi)

240g unsalted butter, cut into small cubes
265g dark chocolate (52% cocoa solids), cut into small pieces
95g dark chocolate (70% cocoa solids), cut into small pieces
290g light muscovado sugar
4 tablespoons water
5 large free-range eggs, separated
a pinch of salt
cocoa powder for dusting

1. Preheat the oven to 170’C. Grease a 20cm springform cake tin and line the base and sides with baking parchment.

2. Place the butter and both types of chocolate in a very large heatproof bowl – it should be big enough to accomodate the entire mix. Put the brown sugar and water in a small saucepan, stir to mix, then bring to the boil over a medium heat. Pour the boiling syrup over the butter and chocolate and stir well until they have melted and you are left with a runny chocolate sauce. Stir in the egg yolks, one at a time. Set aside until the mixture comes to room temperature.

3. Put the egg whites and salt in a large bowl and whisk to a firm, but not too dry meringue. Using a rubber spatula or a large metal spoon, gently fold the meringue into the cooled chocolate mixture a third at a time. The whites should be fully incorporated but there is no harm if you see small bits of meringue in the mix.

4. Pour 800g (about two-thirds) of the mixture into the prepared cake tin and level gently with a palette knife. Leave the rest of the batter for later. Place the cake in the oven and bake for about 40 minutes, until a skewer inserted in the centre comes out almost clean. Remove from the oven and leave to cool properly.

5. Flatten the top of the cake with a palette knife. Don’t worry about breaking the crust. Pour the rest of the batter on top and level the surface again. Return to the oven and bake for 20 – 25 minutes. The cake should still have moist crumbs when checked with a skewer. Leave to cool completely before removing from the tin. Dust with cocoa powder and serve.

6. The cake will keep, covered at room temperature for 4 days.

(This Chocolate Fudge Cake by Ottolenghi is my second submission to Lorraine’s Chocolate Cake Challenge.)