I call it “strategic grocery shopping”. This evening I’ll be doing all the grocery shopping I need to get us through Christmas and Boxing Day. It’s the thing I usually leave until the 24th to accomplish. In the past, I’ve found that shopping on the eve inevitably requires monumental patience to battle through crowds of other last minute shoppers; some even pushing two grocery carts at once, blocking the aisles while they try to decide between 1 kg or 2 kg of prawns. Cooked or uncooked. Or maybe the lobster. Or both. All I can hope for is that everyone else hasn’t decided to shop strategically this year either.

Meanwhile I have some fruit mince bars to keep the energy up. Why bars? Well, sometimes I just can’t be bothered with all that latticed pie or mini tart palaver. All you need is two bits of lovely shortcrust pastry or shortbread dough, sandwiching your favourite fruit mince then in the oven for 20-25 minutes. Done.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Dear Santa,

As usual, my request for Christmas this year boils down to five simple words. Less spam, more world peace.

But if the elves happen to have time, I would also love it if your reindeers could deliver more butter to Norway. It doesn’t seem like a huge ask because no one deserves to suffer from a butter crisis during the festive season. Also if possible, I’d love to have chocolate declared a health food, the way frozen pizza is now a vegetable.

Oh, and wouldn’t it be great to have Happy Valenbirthaversary declared as an officially celebrated holiday? Promise me you’ll think about it.

Thanks and Merry Christmas,
Me.

Chocolate teff Xmas puddings :
(makes 12 mini puddings)

125g 55% dark chocolate buttons
90g unsalted butter
55g teff flour
20g brown rice flour
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
60g brown sugar
60g dried sour cherries or cranberries
20g whiskey or brandy
105g egg whites (from 3 eggs)

Preheat the oven to 150’C (300F). Grease your popover pan (or mini muffin tin) and set aside.

Melt the chocolate and butter in a bowl over a pot of simmering water. In another bowl, place the rest of the dry ingredients, stirring well to combine, then mix in the wet ingredients, followed by the chocolate butter mixture.

Divide the mixture between the holes of the popover pan. Bake for about 15 minutes or until a skewer inserted into a pudding comes out clean. Allow to cool on a wire rack before removing the puddings from the pan.

In the midst of all my recent Christmas baking, it suddenly hit me that concrete plans for our family’s Christmas dessert had yet to be made or discussed. Being the only regular baker in a family of diabetics, non-dessert eaters and the very health conscious, I have a feeling my contribution will end up being.. salad.

Well, I kid, but only just. I’m tempted to throw them for a loop and serve a piece of dessert pie disguised as a savoury dish.

This kale and ricotta pie was baked recently when I found myself in possession of too much kale. A dessert based around kale may seem a little strange but in fact this recipe stems from a traditional French pastry called Tourte de Blettes. Make it when you feel like having something a little different or when you think you aren’t getting your recommended daily dose of greens.

And now, back to more regular baking. What are you serving for Christmas this year?

Kale and ricotta pie :
(based on a recipe from Heart of the artichoke and other kitchen journeys by David Tanis)

For the dough:
2 cups plain flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 cup sugar
pinch of salt
1 stick (113g) cold butter, cut into small pieces
1 egg, beaten with 1 tablespoon milk
grated zest of 1/2 lemon

To make the dough, in the bowl of an electric mixer, using the flat beater, mix the dry ingredients on low speed. Add the butter and mix for about 2 minutes more, until crumbly. Add the egg mixture and the lemon zest and mix another minute, until the dough almost comes together. Divide the dough into two, one portion twice as big as the other. Flatten each into a disc and chill, tightly wrapped, for at least an hour.

For the filling :
1 large bunch chard, trimmed, ribs discarded, and cut into 1/2-inch wide strips (about 4 cups) – or 4 cups of chopped kale (both the leaves and young stems)
1 cup whole-milk ricotta
1 egg
1/3 cup sugar
grated zest of 1/2 lemon
1/4 teaspoon powdered ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 cup raisins, soaked in warm water until plumped
1/4 cup pine nuts

To make the filling, bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Blanch the chard for 1 minute; drain well. Let cool, and squeeze out any liquid.

Preheat the oven to 175’C. In a small bowl, whisk together the ricotta, egg, sugar, lemon zest and spices.

Dust a pastry cloth with flour and roll out the larger portion of dough into a circle 2 inches larger than the diameter of your 9- or 10-inch springform pan. Roll the dough onto the rolling pin, then carefully unroll it over the pan and gently press it into place, so that it comes about 2 inches up the sides of the pan. The dough is fairly soft but don’t worry if it tears. Just patch it up with scraps of dough and it’s barely noticeable once baked.

Drain the raisins, mix them with the greens, pine nuts and ricotta mixture and spread over the dough in the pan.

Roll the second piece of dough into a 1/8-inch thick circle. Place it on top of the filling, trimming and crimping the edges. Bake the pie for 40 to 50 minutes, until the crust is golden. aligncenter size-full wp-image-5936/a